[05 Jan 2010|09:31pm] make_a_case My online class is time consuming, but I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it a bit. Its fun answering questions and knowing immediately if you are right or wrong. Yesterday Dylan and his friend Carlos came over to visit me. Which was nice, because I don't get surprise visits very often and I kind of relish them. Also I don't have guy friends, so I relish the beginnings of what looks like guy friends. We talked about the group, and everyone sat on my bed and shared stories and made jokes. And then my mom asked me to keep the door open. I don't have guy friends, I guess she thought I was having sex with both of them? I said goodbye to Sam this morning because she is headed to London. That is so weird. Tomorrow I apply for a passport. And today I watch a statistics lecture from my computer post comment

[05 Jan 2010|01:09pm] cheerup_emukid i didnt sleep last night and i cried all the way home even though i promised not to. post comment

[05 Jan 2010|03:34am] thedansemacabre i'm quite scared. post comment

nothingness nothingness nothingness [03 Jan 2010|05:06pm] make_a_case [ music | jeffry Lewis ] What do you do at home? I have read like four books, worked out like a manic, and worried my parents because I rarely leave my room or eat carbs after four. I don't even want to tell you how many new blogs I added to my blogs folder, its sick. I need a group of people to hang out with, my social skills are depleting at quite the rate. Or another creative outlet, because at this point reading is just as trashy as watching TV (especially when they are Meg Cabot books) The last time I did acid I went insane, is the song I am listening to right now. Its pretty funny. I've been crazy downloading music. post comment

[03 Jan 2010|02:04pm] cheerup_emukid our voices were saturated in heavy melancholy and soft vowels, the kind of tone used when youve been through hell with the people around you. its an unspoken bond, surviving the worst year of your lives together. the voice of someone thats seen you cry, seen you shake, seen you puke, seen you violent, seen you tired. its what keeps us together in the end, were all so fucking tired. i resolve to not break as many things this year as i did last, be that figurative or not. i resolve to love and appreciate the people in my life more. i resolve to not self medicate, at least not as much. i resolve to buckle down in school. i resolve to work very hard this semester and over the summer. i resolve to take my time, no one but me is in such a rush. this year was just as positive as it was negative, i think. i shed myself of the negative people and negative influences that were bringing me down. i learned to give more attentino and time to the people and things that make me happy. im slowly figuring out what the fuck im doing even if its still not a clear pitcure. all in all, its been a rollercoaster. thats so cliche to say but any other analogy would be worse. at the end of the day or i guess, the year, i just want to be dorothy parker. post comment

[02 Jan 2010|03:03am] thedansemacabre something nostalgic. something remorseful. something apologetic. something sweet. something inspirational. something hopeful. something certain. years come and go. friends are friends. are friends. happy new year everyone. :] post comment

[01 Jan 2010|05:47pm] cheerup_emukid i spent new years quietly and sober. its time to turn over a new leaf, what better way to start? post comment

[31 Dec 2009|11:22am] thedansemacabre i want advice. i want someone who calls me by some stupid nickname. i want an arm thrown around my shoulders which will pull me in and give me an awkward hug. i want to kick back and finally be taught what the hell all the rules are for these sports. i want to be taken on a camping trip. i remember the iconic childhood moment. its the only thing that remains intact. as i sat atop my power rangers bike from huffy, i was being pushed along. i felt his hands rested on me and he ran along, telling me to pedal. and like book told him to, he let go. i rode off through that apple orchard for the first time on a bike. with no training wheels. and most of all, no dad. sometimes it really does bother me. sometimes i want to see if my alcoholic father wants to hop in my car and go for a ride to the shore. aside from the last 15 years of being a terrible person...maybe he'd say something inspirational in the process. probably not. but being raised by a bunch of women didn't really work out for me. post comment

[30 Dec 2009|06:40pm] thedansemacabre jasen got married. i want to find out what all the people i used to be in bands with are doing. i miss evan sometimes, we just burnt stuff and played n64. now he's a marine. post comment

[30 Dec 2009|12:51pm] cheerup_emukid if i dont go outside today, i never will too old not to get excited about rain and roads egyptian ruins, our first kiss i love you more than i ever loved anyone before, or anyone to come someone said your name, i thought of you alone i was just the same, twenty blocks away blew twelve and kissed the thirteenth finger "rabbit, rabbit," on the first i hold my breath did tricks i hoped you wouldnt notice a superstitious hyperrealist ill make you mine post comment

[30 Dec 2009|11:34am] thedansemacabre i need my sense of humor to be brought out more often. i'm enjoying the laughs i've been having lately. post comment

[29 Dec 2009|11:09pm] thedansemacabre let's pray some things work out. i have millions of eyelashes floating out there with the same few wishes on them. just waiting for one of them to work. post comment

[29 Dec 2009|03:46pm] cheerup_emukid oh, ok. youre all retarded and are going to be here the rest of your lives. 6 comments|post comment

[28 Dec 2009|12:20pm] thedansemacabre i try to think that i make somebody feel better whenever i'm around. post comment

[27 Dec 2009|02:54pm] cheerup_emukid on top of the regularly scheduled christmas present dave got me true blood! im so spoiled! post comment

[27 Dec 2009|02:41pm] alongtheparkway well, i'm sorry, i can't make everybody happy. i just can't. 1 comment|post comment

[26 Dec 2009|01:56pm] cheerup_emukid i love interpol lately, seriously cant get enough. i love cars filled with laughter. i love when a beautiful, natural occurence sparks talk of the world ending. i love free packs of caigrettes. i love dance parties and singalongs. i love cooking. i love leaving my cell phone on silent for days at a time. post comment

[25 Dec 2009|03:39pm] cheerup_emukid its christmas! i got a ballin set of skullcandy headphones. post comment

[25 Dec 2009|01:52am] thedansemacabre today is a new day. today may not mean much for some of you, and i have to admit it has lost a lot of the ol' appeal to me as well. but today is christmas. this is a day of hope, where it may have once meant the start of a new age for the people of this world, and it may have meant the birth of the savior of the human race, it became something else. it became love. and hope. embodied together by the story of one man's endeavor to spread joy, and that turned into something new. we give today, and we acknowledge those who shall receive as being deserving of what they get. what i receive today, outside of the material...is the love of certain people i know. whether conditions apply or not, i am thankful to be loved. christmas might have changed again. we might forget about the story of jesus, or remember it well. we might acknowledge the story and deny it's validity. we can refuse the existence of whatever we might have been told to believe...but i believe in something. i have not always been loved in the ways which i wanted to be. you may or may not be in the same boat. but at least for one day...i will appreciate the tangible things which will be given to me, but not nearly as much as the emotions from others that i will receive. i am loved. and i love as well. let's take time and appreciate it, even if it is not the best kind...there are people out there that give a piece of themselves to us and today of all days we should do our best to show our thanks, and give the same kind of decency we receive to those who love us. love, love, love. i may be overdoing it. i may not have ever written a song not pertaining to it. i may have never drafted a short story without it's mention. but it is not because it is a theme which is easy, it is because love is a quality worthy of mention throughout human existence. christmas changes its meaning. but the love behind these meanings remains constant. merry christmas everyone. 1 comment|post comment

[24 Dec 2009|01:57am] thedansemacabre there is nothing to like about me. post comment

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